Lost & Found Life
by mylifeaslulu
Summary: Callie had the perfect life with the perfect boyfriend. But will an unwanted pregnancy change everything? Or will it be a new lover? What of that new lover is her best friend? Her girl best friend. Calzona / Mallie AU This story will have a both ships you've been alerted.
1. Chapter 1

Mark has been my night and charming armor since freshman year. I am convinced that we're in love, well at least I am. But if I could speak for him I'd say he's in love with me to. He'd shown no reason otherwise.

Now we're both seniors and life has taken an unexpected turn. We're expecting. Yes a baby. I still don't know how to feel about it. Leo says that it won't change us but it keeps me up all night thinking. Sometimes it's awkward between us. It never used to be like that. We were everyone's aspirational couple. Everyone else wanted to be like us. And surprisingly, our PDA did not annoy people.

"Callie get your ass down here!" My mom yelled from the kitchen. When she first found out about the pregnancy she was ready to kick me out of the house. I was prepared for it too. But something made her change her mind one day when she saw Mark comforting me.

"I'm coming ma!" I rushed down stairs. Every little thing I did annoyed her, so I tried my best to avoid any arguments.

"Stop running like that you're gonna end up killing it."

"It Mami? Seriously?" I tried to ignore her but my hormones were off the roof tonight.

"Well what else do you want me to call it?"

"Hmm well I don't know maybe something other than it?"

"Oh just hush it and eat your dinner."

I obeyed just to avoid any other discussion.

"Your dad called today."

The words confused me a bit. My dad? Calling? What miracle will happen next? "What did he want?" I asked as I bit a piece off of my fried drumstick.

"He just wanted to know how you were doing."

"Oh." I really didn't care much for my dad, he was never really around for me growing up. I finished my dinner and went back to my room.

After emptying my pea-sized bladder I went to check my phone . Mark had left me a text.

_Mark: hey baby remember tomorrow's your appointment_

Dammit! I'd totally forgotten about it. I'm supposed to meet my best friend Arizona at Joe's to eat. It was our favorite fast food restaurant.

_Me: ofcourse love how could I forget, we get to find out the sex :)_

_Mark: Ik I can't wait, hey I was thinking of something_

_Me: what is it baby_

_Mark: well since were having a baby don't you think we should move out together?_

_Me: yes yes omg 100x yes!_

_Mark: alright I'll tell you my plans tomorrow, now please go rest I love you_

_Me: okay Iove you too 3_

After I stopped texting Mark I went on my Facebook and scrolled down endlessly. It was so depressing for me. I no longer took the beautiful picture that everyone would comment on. Somehow I felt like I shouldn't do that anymore. That I should act different. I'm that girl that got pregnant my senior year. I feel like I'll never be more than that.

* * *

"Cal!" Mark popped from behind me and embraced me from my back. He turned me around and kissed me gently on my lips while holding on to my belly.

"Hey baby, I didn't know you were gonna meet me here." It was the end of last period. We agreed to meet each other at my locker but I guess he was too anxious.

"Well here I am. Are you ready to go? The appointment's in 30 minutes."

"Yeah I-" he stopped me and kissed me once more. He really knows how to take a girls breath away.

"Hey you two when are you gonna stop eating each other's faces?"

Dammit. Arizona. I forgot to tell her I couldn't go eat with her.

"Go get laid Arizona."

"Ugh shut up Mark." Arizona rolled her eyes. She wasn't a big fan of him.

"Ari I'm sorry I forgot to tell you, I can't go eat today. I got an appointment, we get to find out the sex today!"

"Oh come on are you serious? I was looking forward to Joe's all day."

"I'm really sorry! We can go tomorrow?"

"Yeah tomorrow's fine too, good luck." She hugged me and turned to her car. Her beautiful blonde hair blew in the wind as she walked away. She's truly beautiful. Although I love Mark with all my heart, Arizona is my person. I love her to death and back.

"I feel bad."

"She'll be okay, let's go now don't wanna be late."

"Okay." We walked off to his car. On our way I turned over to Arizona's car, she looked a bit disappointed. I went inside the car and sighed.

* * *

We walked outside of the clinic with smiles on our faces. The news we'd receive was exciting. We were both extremely happy with the results.

"So now l'll have two princesses."

"Indeed you will." I giggled happily with the ultrasound pictures in my hand.

"I love you both so much. And I can't live without either one of you."

"Oh baby I know, we love you too." he held my belly and gave it a kiss. He then kissed my forehead followed by my lips. We then walked to the car.

"So about moving in together, are we?" Before starting the engine Mark decided to start a conversation.

"Well yeah but I don't think we can afford it yet."

"Hmm I don't know about that"

I laughed slightly and looked over to him. "What are you up to now?"

"Well I was thinking..."

"Uh oh."

"Come on this is serious."

"I'm all ears babe."

"My aunt has a small unoccupied house about 20 minutes from here..." My expression changed from a giggly smirk to a confused glaze. "I asked if maybe we could you know..."

"Mark what the hell."

"No listen. It's not a bad idea. She wanted to sell it but she said she really wouldn't loose much by just giving it to us ."

"It's not that. It's a house! We don't just take houses from people!"

"It's not people it's my aunt Judy."

"This is serious. And even if we were to take the house it's a lot of responsibilities."

"I am serious babe. I want our daughter to grow up in a house. With both of us there. I want us to have a wall where we could keep track of her height. I want her to have some place that she can call home. I want a home for us."

I looked at him unbelievingly for a couple of seconds. How did I get so lucky? "Okay we can get it."

He gave me a smirk that screamed "I knew you would give in". We then drove to his house where we met up with his mom.

"Hey mom."

"Hey Mrs. Sloan." I always get nervous around her.

"Hey Callie, what did I tell you, I don't like the whole Mrs. thing."

"Sorry Mrs... I mean Kate."

"That's much better. So? What are we having?!" Mark's mom was obviously much more supportive than mine.

"Well..." Mark gave him the ultra sound.

"Oh my god! Is that? We're having a girl! Finally a princess to spoil in the family!" Mark had only one other sibling, Alexander.

"Yes we're so excited." I smiled awkwardly as she hugged me.

"Well what would you guys like to do to celebrate."

"Eh I don't really think that's necessary M... Kate."

"Oh nonsense."

"No really mom, it's a school night."

"Okay fine, can I at least order Chinese?"

"Chinese sounds good." Mark replied and I nodded in agreement.

The night went smooth. After dinner Mark drove me home. I would of invited him in but my mom already doesn't like him.

"Good night princess I love you both." He caressed my belly and kissed me as usual.

"I love you. And thank you for today." He smiled and saw me enter the house. He's always so protective over me.

"What are you doing home so late señorita?" Ugh. Mother.

"It's 9 ma."

"It's late for someone in your condition."

"What are you even... It's not like I'm gonna get pregnant again."

"No but I bet you would like that huh? You and your little boyfriend always making out and shit. I should of been more strict."

I looked at her in disbelief. Oh how I wished to just grab all my things and just disappear from her life. But there's not much I can do, I love her and she's my mom. And I know somehow she loves me too. So I just went to my room. My feet were all swollen so I gave myself a foot rub and fell asleep short after.

* * *

The next morning I woke up to a text from Arizona.

_Arizona: remember today after school, me, you joes_

_Me: ofcourse, don't worry I won't forget 3_

I got up from bed and took a shower. When I got out I was staring at myself in the mirror. I looked bigger than ever.

"I will never fit in my leotard now. Ugh." Ballet was my thing. We'll it still is but try dancing with heavy beach ball attached to you. When I first found out I was pregnant that was my biggest disappointment. I couldn't do what I loved most.

I tossed on a big t shirt and sweats. I was not in the mood for anything. I felt ugly and mostly fat. I picked my hair up in messy bun and called it a day.

"Hey Ari." I walked to my locker with a zombie-like face. Arizona's locker was next to mine and she was packing up to leave school.

"Someone didn't get enough sleep and came late to school." She giggled and gave me a warm hug.

"Well little miss kept kicking a..."

"Wait miss? So it's a girl?"

"Yes." I smiled at her excitement. "Sorry I didn't call last night if figured you liked to hear the news in person."

"You figured right, yay I'm so exited!"

"Yay okay, so are we gonna go get burgers?" I was unbelievably hungry.

"Yeah come on let's go preggos." We walked out of school and she drove us to Joe's.

"Can we get to number ones and two medium drinks pl…"

"One large." I interrupted Arizona while she ordered. She looked back at me and laughed.

"One medium and one large please."

* * *

We both sat down at our favorite booth. We've been coming here since 8th grade and it's been our safe place ever since.

"Well you got quite an appetite."

"Yeah I don't know what's been up with me lately. Maybe it's the baby who knows?" I finished off sarcastically.

She laughed for a bit and then I laughed. I enjoyed watching her laugh. Wow she was stunning. Wait? Am I allowed to talk like that about a friend? A girl friend. What the hell was going on with me. Was it the hormones? I love boys. I love Mark. Arizona is my best friend who just happens to be breathtakingly stunning.

I dozed off staring at her.

"Hello Callie, are you there? Knock knock anyone home?"

"Oh yeah sorry I was just thinking."

"Well we came here to talk so we should talk silly, you can think all you want in that prison you call home."

I smiled at her and then laughed. "Ofcourse we can talk. What do you wanna talk about?"

"Well there's something I been meaning to tell you but I've been scared because it may… it may beak us apart." She bit her lip nervously.

What the hell was she talking about. "Arizona. Don't scare me like this. Don't joke about our friendship. What the hell is up."

"Please don't be mad Cal. I've been wanting to tell you for years but now that you're… you know expecting, I feel like I should tell you. I… have feelings for you."

"Of course you have feelings for me you're my best friend!" I exclaimed almost angrily. I didn't want to admit that I may have some for her too. "Oh no this doesn't have to do with the time we kissed right? That was like 2 years ago and we were half drunk!"

"Not necessarily…I've felt this way about you since we met. I just could never get the guts to tell you." I looked at her disbelievingly as she spoke. "You know with how conservative your mom is and all…-"

"I can't believe you never told me this!"

"Well how did you expect me to risk loosing the one I love?!"

"Love?" Tears were already building in my eyes and one just happened to escape.

"Yes Calliope, love."

The waiter came up to bring us our food. "Hey girls how are you doing?"

I took my my burger and drink from the tray and left. I wasn't mad. I was confused.

"Callie wait up please!"

"I don't want to talk to you right now."

"You should at least give me a good enough reason as to why your choosing to leave.

"Please don't make me do this right now. We can talk another time."

"When? When it's already too late?"

"Wait you don't actually think we have a chance of being together do you?"

"Well I …"

"I'm with Mark Arizona and were having a baby! I will probably be with him for the rest of my life who knows."

"Just because your having a baby with him doesn't mean you have to say with him."

"Are you serious? He's my everything. And since you're my best friend I thought you'd known that."

We both stood in front of each other staring at one another blankly. Could this be the end? Does it have to be the end? Should I tell her that I have mixed feelings about her?

"Look I… I have to go." I broke the silence. "Mark's-" I looked into her eyes. "Mark's waiting for me."

She wiped tears from her eyes and nodded. "Well you're not gonna walk there so I'll take you."

"You don't have to do this."

"I want to."

* * *

The car ride as more awkward then quite. Either I could hear our heart beats or I was going crazy.

"Omg!" I screamed out.

"What what's up are you okay?!"

"Yeah sorry I didn't mean to scream but she's kicking and I've never felt her kick this strong." I smiled as rubbed my belly.

"No don't worry about it, it was cute." She smirked over to me.

She was now stopped at a red light.

"Oh my god! She's at it again! You wanna feel?" This moment was too precious to not share.

"Seriously? Can I?"

"Go ahead." I grabbed her hand and put it on my stomach. She looked at me smiling and giggling.

"She's a little strong one, huh?"

"Yeah." There was a pause between us. The only thing moving was my stomach. It was a bitter sweet moment. I realized that there was a possibility of me loving Arizona. Loving her like I love Mark. But right now that just wasn't possible.

"Beep beep!"

"Oh shit."

We both laughed at the green light in front of us as Arizona began to drive again.

"Well we're here."

"Yup." I nodded.

"So can I hug you goodbye?"

"Yeah of course."

She hugged me across the seat. The hug felt like a real goodbye hug. Like we'd never see each other again.

"Bye."

"Bye."

I closed the car door and sighed. Mark was waiting for me at the door so I dressed my face with a smile.

"Bye Arizona!" He shouted from the door.

I walked over to him and he received me with a hug.

"Hey babies."

"Hey love." I replied.

No one was home so we walked to his room.

"We should watch a movie." He suggested.

"Yeah a movie sounds perfect."

He took off my shoes and fixed his bed for us. I then laid down and let out a sigh of relief.

"Tired baby."

"Very."

He laid down next to me and me in in his arms. He was so warm it was inevitable not to smile. The movie started and 10 minutes into the movie I was fast asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

3 months have passed since Arizona first told me she loved me. Well romantically that is. Ever since that we haven't really talked. Not like before.

Graduation was 2 weeks ago. It was good but not what I expected. I was uncomfortable the whole ceremony. However, I was glad that it was all over. We finally graduated!

Mark & I didn't go to prom. We decided against it since I was too big to fit into a dress. So we just stayed home and watched movies with Kate and Alexander.

I am now a week away from my due date and on the verge of exploding. Me and my mom had a huge fight so I've been staying at Mark's house. His mom has been a sweet heart.

"Hey sweetie no need to get up I brought breakfast for you." She stopped me right before I went down stairs. I know how it feels when you're about to pop."

"Oh thank you Kate, you really didn't have to. You've already done so much."

"And I would do much more."

"Ahhhh!" I screamed in pain.

"What is it?!" She placed the breakfast on nearby table and hurried up the stairs

"I … I don't know but it hurts so much!"

"Do you think it's time?"

"I don't know maybe!"

"Okay put on your coat I'm taking you to the hospital."

" What about Mark?"

"Ill text his dad to dismiss him from school. But stay calm and let's worry about you now come on let's go."

She took the hospital bag and held my hand. Walking down stairs while you're in labor is harder than I thought. We then went into her car and drove off.

"Do you want me to call your mom?"

"No no please don't." My mom was the last person I wanted to see right now. I didn't want her to ruin this moment like she's ruined all the others.

"Are you sure hun? This is a big moment in your life."

"I'm 101% positive-ahhh!"

"Okay okay, the contractions are pretty close so we better hurry up."

I was ecstatic when I was the hospital. I wanted all the drugs I can get! This was too painful to go through raw.

"You're too far along to get an epidural." The nurse who was attending me said.

"What!"

"You're already 9 centimeters dilated, it wouldn't be good for the baby. Do you have any urge to push?"

"Yes! Please get her out!"

The nurses got me ready for the delivery, everything happened so fast.

"Callie, Mark is on his way. He said to keep calm and that you'll do great." Kate was now holding my hand. I am so grateful for her.

I was now ready to push. Mark was still not here so I was a bit hesitant. However I was in too much pain to think straight. I just wanted the baby out.

"Okay on 3 you push." I nodded to the nurse.

"1,2,3"

I pushed as hard as I could. This was the hardest most painful thing I've ever done. I pushed and pushed and nothing happened. The nurse said I was doing good but it didn't feel like it.

"Why isn't she out yet!"

"Don't worry she'll be here soon." Kate reassured me.

"Okay she's crowning. I can already see the head. I'm gonna need you to push harder than ever now sweetie." The nurse looked over to me. "1, 2, 3!"

"Ahhhhrrrrr!" This time I pushed so hard I felt I would explode. I felt that I would never recover from it. But it was okay. Because there she was. My beautiful baby girl. Right in time for her daddy to see her birth. I stared at the living, breathing and crying little figure the nurse laid on my chest. I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her head. She was perfect.

Mark's face was priceless. He looked like he was going into shock.

"Oh my god." He walked up to my bed and wiped off his tears. "She's beautiful love." He leaned down and kissed her forehead." The baby was screaming her lungs out but as soon as her daddy kissed her she stopped. Everyone in the room laughed with joy. He then grabbed my face and kissed my lips.

After we all got to drool over the baby the nurses took her to check her. Mark followed with a camera.

"She is a beautiful and healthy baby girl. She's 7 1/2 lbs and 19 inches long. Big baby, congratulations."

"Thank you." Mark replied. "She really is beautiful."

"Well she's all ready now would you like to hold her?" The nurse said.

"I don't know, I've never held a baby…"

"Well you're a dad now you have to learn."

"I just don't want to you know… break her or something."

"Stop being silly Mark, hold your baby. I'm here. Nothing's gonna happen to her." Kate appeared in back of him and picked up the baby. "Hello there princess. I'm you're nana. Please don't ever call me grandma because I'm still very young. Now let's go to daddy. Put your arms in a cradling position."

"Like this?"

"That's perfect." Kate placed the baby gently on his arms.

"She feels so light." He smiled and walked over to me. "Look babe I'm carrying her."

"I see, you're a pro." I giggled weakly.

"I know." He smirked. "Oh by the way, Arizona said she'll be by later."

Oh great. "Okay."

"What happened between you two anyway. You two used to be inseparable."

"Nothing."

"Mhm" he said cradling the baby.

"You look nice carrying her." I smiled at him.

"I bet I do." We both laughed. "So what are we naming her?" He sat next to me on my bed.

"I was thinking something with an S."

"Okay S it is." He played with the baby's hand.

It was quiet for a moment as we both were thinking of names.

"How about Sofia?" I blurted out.

"Sofia is beautiful."

"Really?"

"Yes really." He kissed her nose. "Sofia Rose."

"That's perfect babe! Ugh I love you so much." He scooted over and kissed me.

_Knock. Knock._

"Come in."

"Hey." Arizona walked in smiling in awe. She was holding a pink teddy bear in one hand and her back bag in the other.

"Hey Arizona come in and see my beautiful daughter." Mark called her over.

"Uh, okay."

I didn't really know what to say. So I just smiled awkwardly.

"How are you feeling Cal?"

"I'm okay." I looked away from her.

"Can I hold her?"

"Yes, of course." I don't know if it was just me, but the tension in the room felt intense.

Mark placed Sofia in Arizona's arms. "I have to go." He said. "Me and mom are preparing a surprise for you. We won't be gone long. And since Arizona's here she can keep you company."

"A surprise? Uh oh." I giggled.

"Don't worry you're gonna love it." He kissed me and Sofia and left with his mom.

"She's beautiful." Arizona started. "Just like her mom."

After a pause I looked down and fought back tears. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why are you making this harder than it should be."

"Oh stop it you know exactly why, you know I love you, you know I won't stop fighting for you that easily, not after all these years."

"This isn't fair. You can't make me choose!"

"Because you'll choose him?"

"Because I'll choose my family. I have a chance to give Sofia a family. A real one. One that's not broken. Something I never had."

"I'm not telling you to separate her from her father."

"You just don't understand.

"Okay. I just wanna know one thing then.

God she looked so beautiful. She was wearing an over sized sweater that suited her perfectly.

"What do you wanna know Arizona?"

"Do you love him? Will you always love him? Tell me the truth and I'll leave you alone."

"Yes. Yes. But I love you too."

"I know, as a friend."

"No, I mean I love you."

She looked at me with sparkling eyes. What have I done.

"You do?" She said half crying.

"I do. But we can't be a thing Arizona. Don't you understand. Look at her. She needs both parents."

The sparkles in her eyes disappeared.

"I love you and I'm already falling in love with Sofi." She said. I smiled at the nickname. I smiled but I was hurting inside. "So I'm gonna let you both of you. You deserve the best."

"You're talking like you're leaving forever."

"I might. We're moving. My family is going back to Boston."

"What!" I was in shock. "Are you serious right now that's like a whole country away, we'll never ever see each other!"

"It'll be good that way love." Sofia woke up and started crying so Arizona placed her in my arms. "It'll be too painful looking at you knowing I can't be with you. So I'll just go."

I tried to feed Sofia but she wouldn't latch on. She was getting very cranky and I had no idea what to do. "You can't just go and never talk to me again Arizona!"

Arizona re-positioned Sofia's head so that she could latch on quicker. Then she caressed her finger gently on her small cheeks. I looked at her nervously. It was weird having her look at my boob. It was good though because Sofia latched on successfully. "Trust me it's better this way."

She kissed my lips so gently and passionately. Her lips were the softest my lips ever kissed. Everything about the moment felt perfect. How could it be so wrong?

"I have to go now." She parted our lips.

"Now?"

"Yes now. I'll see you again sometime."

"Arizona."

"I love you." She placed the pink teddy bear on my lap and stood up from the bed.

I didn't say anything back. I just sat there motionless and wordless. But then she walked out of the room. And I had everything to say. She should stay. There could be a chance between us. I did want to be with her. Then it felt like I did the right thing. For the innocent bundle in my arms. And also for both of us.

* * *

The next day at 12:00pm I was discharged. I was glad that I finally got to go home. I was scared too.

The nurse was teaching me and Mark how to put Sofia in the car seat correctly. I really wish it would've been Kate teaching us but she couldn't get out of work today.

"And then you snap this like this 'clack' and you are set." She finished off.

"You think we can repeat what she just did on our own babe?" Mark said laughing.

"Ya I'm sure." I replied expressionless.

He looked at me for a while, it looked like he was trying to guess what was up to me. His investigation was cut short by Sofia's cooing.

"Aww what's up Sofia are you anxious to go home huh baby?" He made funny faces to her and played with her cheeks.

"How about Sofi for a nickname?" I let out randomly while I smiled at the origin of the nickname.

"Ah cute and short, I like it. Sofi it is." He picked up the car seat and hospital bags. "You ready to go?"

I finished zipping up my jacket. "Yup"

We signed out and left the hospital. Placing the car seat in the car seat holder was a bit of a challenge for us.

"Look just make sure it snaps!" I yelled out from the front seat.

"I'm trying but it's not snapping!"

"You seriously don't know what you're doing Mark?"

"Hey I don't see you here trying so don't complain."

"My vagina feels like the Grand Canyon right now okay and I don't know what that means but that's what it feels like. So unless you want to switch places, keep trying."

"Okay Judy Moody." He said lowly.

"What did you say?"

"I was talking to Sofi!"

"Mhm sure."

'Snap'

"Yes!" He exclaimed.

"Finally." I followed.

On our way to Mark's house I noticed we weren't on the usual road.

"Mark where the hell are you doing, this isn't the right way."

"Just sit down and relax, I know what I'm doing."

"Okay but whatever you're doing keep in mind we have a newborn."

"I know." He smiled mischievously.

I squinted my eyes and looked over to him giggling.

After about 18 minutes we arrived. I didn't recognize anything about this place. We were parked in a driveway of a beautiful small house.

"Where are we?" I came out of the car and looked at the house. Could this be...? Nah.

"Take out your things love, I'll grab Sofi." He tossed me some keys.

"You have keys to this place? And why am I taking my things to a place I don't even know?"

"Stop being stubborn and go in, the silver key opens the front door." He held the car seat.

I walked over to the front door and picked out the silver key in my hands. I hesitated before unlocking the knob.

"Come on Callie. It's pretty chilly out here."

I opened the door to a perfectly furnished living room. I walked in and got a closer look. There were two soft leathered couches that faced a middle sized flat screen tv. The tv looked a lot like the one in Mark's room. There were two black coffee tables at the outer ends of the couches. The look was finished off with a vibrant Victorian style red carpet.

"Welcome home princesses."

"Home?"

"Home." He smiled as he put the car seat on the floor.

"Oh my god! Is this the house you were talking about?"

"Yes it is. My mom helped me decorate it and stuff."

"Everything looks so beautiful. But...how did you pay for all this? Don't tell me your mom had anything to do with this..."

"We can talk about that another time love."

I wrapped my arms around his waist and reached for a kiss. "Thank you for giving this family a home."

Our kiss was interrupted by Sofi's cry.

"Someone wants a kiss too huh?" Mark kneeled down and picked her up. He smothered her face in kisses and then handed her to me. "I think she's hungry."

I pouted at him. "My boobs are sore."

"Well I'd feed her but I don't think I'll be of much helped." We both laughed.

"Come on I want you to see something." He put his hand on my shoulders and led me to a room. "Are you ready?"

I nodded. Sofi cooed. "We both are."

He opened the door to beautiful nursery. The walls were a soft pink with white flowers painted on them. The crib was big and white and had the most beautiful crib set. The set had tiny flowers embroidery all over it. The bumper was a silky white that gave the crib a royal touch. The crib was finished off with a princess mobile attach to the middle of it. The room also had a matching rocking chair, dresser and changing table. On top of everything there were toys and accessories from the baby shower every where. Everything was so perfect. I couldn't help but think how he could afford everything.

"So what do you think."

"I think that... Wow."

"Wow is right, you see why I haven't been around so much this week?" He laughed. "Well what are you waiting for Miss. Sofia is hungry." He led me to the rocking chair and then placed a feeding pillow on my lap.

I started feeding Sofi but I was still amazed. My eyes couldn't stop looking around the room. It really looked like a palace.

"I only want the best for my princess."

I looked at him and smiled. "Really thank you."

"No need babe. Now you girls wait here I have to straighten up some things down stairs.

I nodded and then my eyes went back to staring at the walls. I was thinking about how lucky I got. Even though I got pregnant young I got lucky. With Mark and his mother. And of course Sofi. But I still felt incomplete. Shouldn't I be happy? I have it all. Don't I?

I finished feeding and burping Sofi so I laid her down in her enormous crib. She looked like angel. I was already deeply in love with her. I turned on the baby monitor and gave her a kiss before turning to her diaper bag. I pulled out my phone and searched for Arizona's number.

Should I call her?

Maybe I should text her.

Okay I'll call.

_Ring._

_The number you have dialed is no longer in service. Please check the number and dial again._

And in that moment I knew what had happened. She was serious about letting me go. I've not only lost my best friend but the one I love. And there was nothing I could do about it. I was lost.


	3. Chapter 3

**Forgot to do this earlier; Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters they all belong to Shonda Rhimes expect Kate Sloan.**

Today Sofia was 5 months old. Today I realized that the spark of having a baby was fading away for Mark. Either the stress of having a baby was catching up to him or he just didn't want to be a father anymore. I've been doing everything for Sofi lately.

I've also found out where all the money for the furniture came from. Mark decided that he didn't want to go to college. He said it wasn't easy convincing his mom to give him his college fund for this purpose, but she gave in for Sofia's sake.

When he told me about this I was mad. He shouldn't of given up college that easy. But then again I was grateful for everything. How else were we gonna come up with the money? Neither of us had worked a day in our lives.

But still there was one thing that was worse than anything I mentioned before. Mark was turning into alcohol for everything. In just a couple of months he changed from the perfect father to a screw up. What was causing him to change like this?

"Good morning babe." It was nearly 1 pm. He walked into our bedroom looking like he hadn't slept all night. He stood at the doorway taking off his shoes.

"And where have you been all night?" I replied while flipping channels on the tv.

"Oh don't tell me you're gonna go all mom on me huh? I thought we moved out for a reason. Hey look at me!"

I turned my head slowly to him while rolling my eyes. "I just got Sofi to sleep so you better shut the hell up unless you're gonna take care of her yourself."

Wow. Was this my life now? The unhappy housewife who hated her husband? And worse yet, the unhappy 19 year old housewife who hated her husband.

"You're always complainin' bout something Cal!" He threw his shoes across the room and threw himself on the bed.

"And you're always drunk!" I hopped off of bed immediately.

"You know what you need, you need a lil lovin'. That'll sort ya out." He laughed and then covered himself with the comforter. "I love you cal okay, don't you forget that." He fell asleep almost instantly.

I couldn't stand being in the same room with him so I went to read in Sofi's nursery.

Before sitting down and starting my next Jane Austen novel, I tucked Sofia in so that she wouldn't wake up so soon from her nap. I needed a little me time and reading was the only way I could get it now a days. After I tucked her in I tippy toed across the room from her and sat on the rocking chair. Ah. Relaxing.

Yeah right. There was too many things on my mind right now to focus on a world's classic novel.

As I looked at the walls I started thinking about my best friend. Would Arizona like Sofi's room? I think she would. I think she would love playing with her in here.

Then I started thinking about how there was a possibility that I'd never see her again. Soon warm tears started flowing down my cheeks. I wanted to scream. But for now I had to settle for silent cries. I wanted to let everyone know how I was feeling inside. But it might wake Sofi up. So I will settle for silent cries.

I really couldn't believe I let her go. At that moment I didn't realize it, but now I do. Every day in fact. I let the love of my life walk out.

My depressive thoughts were interrupted by Sofi's cooing and giggling. She was magical that way. She could keep herself happy sometimes. It was my favorite part about her. I wiped my tears away and went to pick her.

"Hey princess! Did someone have a good nap?"

When I laid her to sleep she was on her back. But now she was on her tummy and her head was straight up as if she were trying to look over the crib. One of her hand was in her mouth and the other she used for support.

"Mami's very proud of you my little princess! You can roll over now." I picked her up and smothered her with kisses.

"We're gonna go on a trip today baby girl so lets get you all pretty."

I fed and dressed up Sofi and got her diaper bag ready. Then I set her down in her jumper so that I could get dressed myself. I settled for a maroon sweater, blue jeans and chestnut colored uggs. Yes, motherhood has taken away the bit of fashion taste I had left. I picked up Mark's jacket, took the car keys and left the house.

10 minutes later I arrived at the mall. Now the problem was to set up the stroller. Ugh. I really needed super mom Kate.

"Hold on Sofi Mami's got this just give me a...clack!...second." I tripled check the stroller to make sure it was secure. "Omg! Sofi I think I got! I really got it!" I started dancing around the stroller. She chuckled at my craziness as I picked her up and buckled her down.

* * *

Once we were inside the mall I felt a level of comfort that felt foreign to me. I really missed shopping. And now that I was shopping for two I figured it would be double the fun.

20 minutes later I'd only bought stuff for Sofia. I didn't even know what to buy for me. What the hell did moms even buy?

I passed by Forever 21 and hesitantly went in. I felt a bit paranoid at the store with a stroller. Everyone else was young and childless. But I decided to ignore my thoughts and do something nice for myself for once.

"How do you think these shorts would look on momma Sofia?" I pulled out a pair of sequin shorts and analyzed them for a brief moment. My 5 month old wasn't the best choice for a fashion critic. So I decided they were cute but when will I ever wear them? Sigh. Shortly after, Sofia started getting cranky.

"I'm almost done baby." I pushed the stroller back and forth as I finished looking through some shirts. However she decided to get louder.

"Is that your sister?" A young girl asked curiously.

Without thinking I nodded with a smile. _Shit_

"She's adorable." She smiled before walking away.

Why did I nod to that? I was never gonna forgive myself for it.

I picked up Sofia and cradled her. Looks like all she wanted was to be held. I kissed her cheeks trying to relieve my guilty conscience. That Freudian slip was gonna hunt me for a while.

"Callie?"

I looked over to see who it was.

"Oh hey, Alexandra right?"

"Right, but you can call me Lexie." She smiled. "Cute baby."

"Thanks." I smiled back.

"Need any help? You look like you have your hands full."

"N-, yeah I do actually. Can you get me that chupo- I mean pacifier on the left pocket of that diaper bag?"

"This one?"

"Perfect thanks." I placed the pacifier on Sofia's mouth. She instantly laid her small head on my shoulder.

"Hey have you talked to Arizona recently? I was surprised she was asking 'me' about 'you', you know since you guys are best friends and all."

"No why, do you have her number?!" A butterfly flew across my stomach like it were on steroids.

"Yeah do you want it?" She started flipping through her phone.

"Yeah I _need_ it."

"Okay if you want you can give me your number and I'll text it to you."

"Yeah of course." Anything for Arizona's number.

We exchanged numbers and shortly after, I left the mall. After I finished strapping Sofi in her car seat I sat motionless in the car staring at Arizona's number. Should I call her now? I didn't want to call her anywhere near Mark so now would be ideal. But what if she has already found someone else? Then why would she be asking about me? Okay I'll just call her.

_Ring._

"Hello?" Her voice hadn't changed a bit. My emotions were flying through the roof. Immediately after I regretted the decision.

"Babbaa!" Sofia screamed from the backseat.

"Calliope? Callie. Callie is that you?"

_Damnit_.

I gulped down loud enough that I'm pretty sure she heard me.

"Gaggaaa!"

"Sofi, is that Sofi? Callie answer me baby I know it's you."

"Hi." I felt my voice crack as soon as my tears fell down.

"Call..." I can tell she was also on the verge of crying.

"I miss you so much Ari." I lost it and began to cry. "Please come back, you need to! Come home."

"But I am home love, this is where I belong. And you belong there, in Seattle, with your happy family."

"I'm not happy though! No ones happy! What's the point then!?"

"You decided it for it to be this way."

"Well I decided wrong and I need you!"

"You're not a teen anymore Callie, you need to decide what's best for Sofi now. She needs her father. Remember when you told me that? It broke me, but now I get it."

"No, baby please!" I cried through the phone. "Forget everything I said! You'd be a better father than Mark, I wish you'd see him. Nothing's going the way I planned. I was put on anti-depressants because Kate thought I had post-partum depression. But I don't need no damn pills, I need you!"

"I understand, but it will all get better. I promise. Once you get used to it, it won't hurt anymore."

Sofia started crying. I guess she didn't like the mess her mom was creating. But I couldn't control it.

"What's up with Sofi, why is she crying Cal?"

"I don't know." I said blankly. I had no more fight left in me.

"Go comfort her. I don't like hearing her cute self cry."

"How am I supposed to do that? I can't even comfort myself? I'm in the middle of a parking lot crying for gods sake!"

-

And there went the most important call of my life.

I sat there blankly for about a minute before hopping to the backseat with Sofia. I fed her a bottle and watched as she fell asleep. My poor innocent angel. Was staying with her dad despite all the pain it caused me the right thing? Or does my happiness play a role in hers too?

After she was sound asleep I hopped back to the front seat and drove to Mark's house. Kate had called earlier that she wanted to see Sofi so I figured this would be a good time.

The visit lasted about an hour. I really didn't want to go home but Kate had business to take care of. So I took the longest ways so that I could drive more. Driving felt free. I loved driving more than anything now a days. It was better than being at home watching Nick Jr. all day. Besides, Sofia enjoyed the window views more than the actual shows.

When I got home I parked the car inside the garage. It was raining and I didn't want to get Sofia wet. I picked her up from her car seat and laid her on my shoulder. I prefer leaving the car seat in the car. Right before I opened the door I heard two people having a conversation. Who did Mark have over?

I opened the door expecting the worst. Now a days I wouldn't be surprised if he brought another woman home.

"Uh hey." I said closing the door. The woman he was talking to was a blonde.

"Hey look who came to visit."

When she turned around my heart skipped a couple of beats. It was her. In skin and bones. The love of my life. Arizona.

"A..A...Arizo." I was speechless.

She looked at me with the glossiest bluest eyes. Her hair was curled in all the right places. If I didn't know her I'd say she was a living angel.

"Calliope." She gave me her best super magic smile that lit up my world.

To Mark our encounter might look like an exaggeration but to us it was the reunion of a lifetime.

Arizona walked up to me and wrapped her arms around me and Sofia. And then everything felt right again. Like the day at the hospital. I don't care how different this family could be. This is what I wanted. I don't know how I was gonna get it, but I was. My family was with Arizona and Sofia. And that's all I knew.

"All I want to do right now is kiss you calliope." She whispered into my ears as she hugged me.

Every cell in my body was telling me to kiss her. To show her all the love I have for her. But my mind knew it wasn't the time. Not yet.

"Here give me Sof, you two catch up." Mark grabbed Sofia from my arms and took her to her room.

"She's really beautifu-" I cut Arizona in the middle of her sentence with a kiss. Mark could be back any second so this was all we had. I locked my lips passionately into hers not wanting to let them go. I missed her so much and I never wanted her to leave again.

"Woah you really missed me, eh?" She giggled in between our kiss.

"You scared the hell out of me when you hung up...on me."

We had our private conversation at the same time of our kiss. We could afford to loose any time.

"You seemed so hurt...and...I couldn't bare having you this sad."

"I love you ...I love you." I bit soft into her bottom lip.

Our breathing rates increased with every word.

"I love you too, so so much." She continued as she grabbed on to my hair.

"Well what do you girls want to do next?" Mark yelled out from the hallway.

That was our cue that our free time was over. We separated ourselves so fast you couldn't tell there was ever any contact with each other.

"I actually have to go."

"No!" They both looked at me."I mean why so soon."

"I'm staying in Tacoma for a week. I'll text you the hotel I'm staying at."

"Okay fine." Ugh.

We hugged each other tightly for a while.

"Any longer?" Mark interrupted.

Arizona cleared her throat. "See you soon."

I couldn't even say goodbye. I knew that as soon as she walked out of the door my depression would run back inside me. The darkness that's always following me will be back.

And so it did.

I immediately became dependent on Arizona. I need her. I can't live one second without her. Not only is she my oxygen but she is also my gravity. She keeps me together. She keeps me living. And at this second she's not here, at this second I feel more dead than living.


	4. Chapter 4

The next morning I woke up with one thing in my mind. I was gonna see Arizona today. Wether I had to convince her to drive down to Seattle, or I had to go to Tacoma myself. But I was gonna see her today.

Mark didn't spend the night as usual so I let Sofi sleep with me. If only it didn't give her bad habits I would do it every night. It was nice having someone to cuddle with even if that someone was less than 2 feet long.

It was now 11:47 am. Sofi was down for a nap and I was on my phone getting ready to call Arizona. I've been meaning to call her earlier but I decided not to so I didn't sound too desperate. Who was I kidding though? I was desperate! In fact I've never been so desperate in my life.

Finally I gave in and called. As the phone rang my heart raced a marathon.

_Come on pick up_

"Hello love."

_Phew_

"Good afternoon beautiful." I smiled at the thought of her beautiful face.

"What's up?"

"I was wondering if you could come visit today." I replied nervously.

"I'm sorry I can't, I returned the car I rented yesterday."

I sighed loud enough that I'm sure she heard it.

"-but I'm sure you can drive here? My hotel rooms pretty big and Sofi can play-"

"No no, I mean.." I really wanted some alone time with Arizona. It's been way too long. "Her grandma really wants to spend some time with her so I'll drop her off at her house."

She giggled at my foolishness. "Right. But you gotta promise me to bring her over some other time."

"I promise."

There was a short pause. It was a sweet one though. As if we were both taking in this wonderful moment.

"So when are you coming?"

_Right now. As soon as possible!_

"Hmm, what time would be convenient for you?"

"I should be asking you, you're the one with the baby." We both chuckled.

"How about I leave my house in an hour? I'll drop Sofia off at Kate's house and then I'll head to Tacoma. So I'll be there in like two hours."

"That's perfect. I'll be sure to order something for us to eat."

Sofia's cry started to fill the room.

"Okay see you there, the little monsters awakened."

"I'll text you the address, Goodbye Calliope." My heart flipped before I got to hang up. Nothing compared to when she called me by my first name. Only she could do it as perfect. The crying finally woke me up from my Utopia and I went to get Sofi.

* * *

"You look beautiful Hun." Kate complimented me when she opened the door of her house. "Is there a special occasion? Are you and Mark going out somewhere." She still thought her son was an angel.

I was wearing a coral colored chiffon shirt with some khaki skinny pants. On my feet I wore nude Steve Madden flats. I finished off my look with a classic pony tail.

"Thank you Kate. It's really nothing. And no I'm just going to see a very good friend whom I haven't seen in a while." I kissed Sofia before handing her over. "Be good princess, mommy will try to not be too long."

"Don't worry about it, I miss having her over."

I smiled. "She loves being over, I'm sorry I can't bring her more often. By the way I'm going to Tacoma so I'm really sorry if I get here too late."

"No worries Hun, if you want you can leave her overnight, I'm not working tomorrow."

"I'll call you if I can't make it in time. Again, thank you so much I love you!" I hugged them both before I returned to my car.

* * *

40 minutes later I'd arrived at Arizona's hotel. I was a little nervous but mostly anxious. My hair had taken another toll so now it was more of a messy ponytail. I tried to fix it but I ended up leaving it like that.

"Arizona Robbins." I answered to the receptionist.

"5th floor, room 502."

"Thank you." I headed to the elevator. As the elevator went up I played with my fingers. Why was I so nervous? If there's anyone I'm most familiar with its Arizona.

_Bleep_

I took a deep breath and then walked a long the long corridor. It was pretty bright since all the lights were on. I looked at the first door labeled 500 and kept walking. When I reached 502 I stopped in front of the door.

Do I look okay? I reached for my phone and tried to see my reflection on the screen. Ugh my hair was a mess. Maybe I should redo it. I opened my purse and looked for a brush.

"Where the hell are you!" I yelled to myself.

The door in front of me opened slowly.

"Calliope." She smiled as she hid some front hair in back of her ears.

"Arizona." I chuckled patting down my hair.

"You look...beautiful."

"Don't lie to me." I kept digging into my purse.

"I could never lie about that. Seriously...wow."

I stopped looking into my purse and looked into her eyes. "You really think so?"

She took a few steps forward and placed her hand on my face. "What do you think?" She closed her eyes and leaned over to kiss me. "Come in." She grabbed my hands and led me inside the hotel.

"So instead of ordering the horrible food they serve here I thought we'd eat some of this pound cake I have here. Plus I want to take you out to dinner and I don't want you to be too full." She opened the fridge and pulled out perfectly cut slices of pound cake.

"Sounds amazing." I grinned at the deliciously looking cake.

Arizona smiled and pat a stool so that I could sit next to her on the kitchen counter. I went timidly and we were now facing each other. We stared at each other for a while like two awkward teenagers on their first date. After all this was the first time we were alone knowing we both felt the same way about each other.

"Mmm, I love pound cake. Rich, buttery pound cake." She started as if she were trying to break the ice.

"Yes, mmm, delicious!" I replied awkwardly arching my eyebrows.

We looked at each other for another 30 seconds before Arizona started again.

"What are we doing?" She put down the slice of cake.

"We're eating delicious pound cake." My mouth was half full.

"You know what I mean! What are 'we' doing? For 'us'. Am I just supposed to go back to Boston and leave you and Sofia again?"

I put my elbow on the counter and rested my head on my hands before letting out a sigh. The whole time I kept my eyes on her. "I don't know. All I know is that I want to be with you. And I want Sofi to grow up with two loving parents. Now I know that that doesn't necessarily mean Mark."

"When are you gonna tell Mark about us?"

I covered my face with hands and sighed again.

"Callie...you are gonna tell Mark about us, right?" She looked at me in disbelief.

"Ofcourse Arizona! But I need time."

"Well how much more time are you gonna need?"

"I don't know okay, I don't know how he's gonna take it."

"Are you scared of him or something?"

I looked at my hands and twiddled my fingers.

"Callie look at me." She placed her hands on my chin and looked into my eyes. "Are you scared of your boyfriend? The father of your daughter? The man you live with?"

I couldn't lie to her baby blue eyes.

"I, I just... Look he gets drunk a lot."

"You shouldn't be with someone you fear Calliope. Even if you're not gonna be with me right away because you haven't come out to other people, I want you to leave him. If you don't feel safe with him you shouldn't be with him."

"I know, but Sofi..."

"Don't even start with that, He's not even a good father!"

"I need time!" I yelled out.

Arizona stared back at me.

"Okay...I'm not gonna force you to do anything." And she looked away.

I stood up from the stool and stood close to her. I brushed my fingers through her golden locks. She looked at me with hopeless eyes.

"I'm so sorry, just give me time to figure out where I'm gonna stay. Please love."

"I understand." She stood up in front of me. "I do, you have Sofia...it's not easy. But I'm here for you, for us."

I nodded bitting my bottom lip. She put her warm fingers under my chin and pressed her soft lips against mine. She felt heavenly. The moment felt heavenly.

"For us." I replied softly in between a kiss.

**Sorry I took forever to upload! I am stuck between college applications but just to let you know I have not abandoned this story, Im just super busy! Thank you everyone for reading! -AN**


End file.
